I don't know how people find the time to blog every single day and still have interesting things to write about.
It's true that the good girls keep diaries, because the bad girls never have the time. I certainly don't.
My friend and I had a very creative, artsy photo shoot last Friday night and it was such a blast. I'm so thankful we actually did it, because it there a lot to a shoot that I forget to think about such as angles and posing. Posing is one of the hardest things for me to nail here lately because it is just something I have never really done before. I've been practicing in front of the mirror, and believe it or not it has done wonders.
I just let Aelias take the lead on this one, and I was stunned and fascinated by his ideas. He is such an artist with an abstract way of thinking and it definitely added some super cool elements to the pictures.
Hopefully our next shoot will be my portfolio pictures. I have been consumed with what I want to wear in the pictures for my portfolio, and the story I want to create with them. As a model you just cannot find work without a well put together book, and I am going to give it everything that I've got to make it as special and professional as possible. I want to be exceptional. I want to stand out.I was contacted by a scouting agency called One Source Talent, and was supposed to interview with their talent agency on Saturday. I drove an hour to their office just to have google maps completely turn me around and I got lost as hell. The woman who scheduled my interview made it very clear that being on time was priority and that if I was just a minute late then I would be turned away. I gave myself plenty of time with traffic and to find the place, and after going in circles for thirty minutes when I had already reached the general area, I would have been late and gave up.
I went straight from Irving to my Real World audition, and my mouth dropped when I saw how many people were auditioning. I walked in with my VIP pass, and still waited for an hour and a half before my interview. I sat at a table with a guy and a chick to fill out my questionaire and we chatted while we waited and I was glad to have met them. I just love talking to people. Everyone has so much to offer, even if it is just one, hour-long conversation. We were placed in groups of 7 or 8 and when it was our time to interview, we sat at a table with one of the producers or directors. She collected our papers and then when she called our names we were instructed to state our name, age, where we were from, and one thing people don't really know about us.
Turns out, I might not be quite as interesting as I thought. In my group alone there was a transexual man transitioning into a woman who did drag in Dallas, a guy whose mother overdosed on cocaine, a girl who had been completely on her own since she was 16 years old, and the blonde amateur fighter on the MTV show Caged.
Then there is me, the girl from one of the smallest, unknown towns in the world with a population of 2,000 who has never lived outside of North Texas, has both parents who are married, youngest of four, wannabe actress and model who is just starting out. I have no deep dark secrets, just a lot of heart. When it was my turn, I said that I wrote song lyrics and that since I'm not really a musician not many people knew about it. But that isn't even entirely true. All of my close friends know about songs, and some of them even know a few by heart. That was it. She thanked us and we were excused with the hope that they would call us within 48 hours to let us know if we had made it through.
I'm an open book. The only mystery to me is my bizarre perspectives and thought process. But no one can open that door unless they have a relatively profound conversation with me. It is a new thing I learned about myself that day, and I would like to attempt to find a way to use that to my advantage and "sell" myself with it. I didn't get a call back to go to the second round of auditions, but it was a provoking experience nonetheless.
"Be steady on your feet, no matter the trouble you meet. Lions make you brave, giants give you faith, death is a charade. You don't have to feel safe to feel unafraid."